OASBY CRICKET CLUB FIXTURES 2009

May 3rd Pinchbeck A
May 17th Scopwick H
May 24th Ancaster H
May 30th Ashby Carrington H
June 21st Fenland Poacher A
June 28th Hougham & Marston A
July 5th Nelson Ashes A
July 15 SEH A (TZ Hall)
Jul 19th Scopwick A
Aug 1st Ashby Carrington A
Aug 9th Ancaster A
Aug 23rd Nelson Ashes H
Sept 6th Fenland Poacher A

Results.
Sunday 6th Sept; Fenland Poacher Away. Oasby Won by 77 Runs.
Oasby 188 for 9. Poacher 111 all out.
Oasby lost the toss and batted.
September is not a month to start a cricket match at 2pm and finish it in good light! Car headlights shone brightly as the final overs of the Oasby attack unleashed shock and awe onto the Poacher batsmen. Winning the game when Poacher ceded in the gloom was a hollow victory, but none the less deserved.
Billbo Baggins started the away teams account with a fine knock. His partners varied. Caley didn't slow the rate, his innings was brief. Husemeyer hit a personal best of measured mature batting. Hyland left things to his mates. Gilbert a brisk cameo, Hall likewise. Fun for all with Rieder and Enever at the crease. Rieder amassed his top score ever and took mature charge of proceedings when Enever departed. Tedbury hit at least two balls.
Tea was a slow affair. We knew it was getting dark and wondered at the tactics of Poacher in this regard.
Chandler and Captain slow opened the bowling. Reider took his place at keeper and started dropping things instantly. This spread amongst the team like the Clap at a Hen party. Baggins had the fines kitty bulging after this game. Husemeyer swelled a finger and will have ladies smiling for at least a week. Tedbury attempted many stops, all with feet. He was then put at slip to kick any catches that came his way. A sickening injury to Chandler occurred when his moobs caught in the turf and pole axed the big fella. Gilly turned one, Tedders didn't. The unit 'Hall' prospered, the Beast 'Terry' frightened. Caley and Guinness bowled a tricky 'mixed bag'.
Then the tactic from Poacher we had been waiting for. 'If your big boys keep bowling quick we are going home.Its too dark!'
Fair enough. Game to Oasby, Technical knock out.

Beer at 'Draymans' Spalding. Batemans 5/10. Decor 2/10. Tedburys Local. Dry as a nuns chuff. Beer 0/10. Shut. They must have known Mike was coming.

Guinness 46.Caley 1.Husemeyer 17. Hyland 0.Gilbert 20.Hall 12.Rieder J. 29 no.Heaver 2. Enever 23.Tedbury 1no.
Chandler 4-1-6-1.Heaver 9-0-16-1.Gilbert 8-2-17-3. Tedbury & Guinness 6-0-31-1 Tedbury took the wicket!. Hall 4-0-10-2. Enever 4-1-5-1. Caley 2-0-10-1.

See photos - you're probably in one.

Season 09 stats.
Batting average. Gilbert 41. Guinness 25. Rieder j. 16. Tedbury 8. Chandler 7. Hall 13. Young 9. Caley 6. Hyland 6. Husemeyer 7.
Bowling average. Gilbert 13. Chandler 19. Tedbury 35! Young 22.Heaver13.5 .Heaver 18. Hall 21.Caley 36. Guinness 17!

Monday August 31st; HAMS 6-a-side competition; Oasby came 3rd out of 6

Bank holiday Monday. How many Oasby stalwarts were unavailable,sick or just scared? It is not known but those that turned up had a splendid day. There are teams in the vicinity considerably worse than Oasby and many positives were discovered. Detailed scores are not available but Oasby played 3 games and were feared by all. They lost their first game to the eventual winners by a mere 4 balls - and in the process notched up the highest score made against the victors. Unfortunately their bestest batsman liked the remodeled Tedbury bowling - even though it pitched and spun a mile. Tedbury would also like it known that he scored the first boundary of the competition. Other batsmen all contributed and with greater vigour. Especially Mr Extra - who also played a big part in the defeat of Kavaliers. Here of note was an elegant stumping by Kev and the widely varying bowling of Captain Ben. How does one spot that slower ball? It is so well disguised. In this game the opening pair were undefeated ; Guinness frequently dancing down the pitch to the spinners and Hall demonstrating a wide variety of one shot. Again and again and again. Mention must be made of Hall's bravery. "I don't need a box". Oh yes you do. See photos. It is hoped that the equipment recovers. Following the deployment of a hypersophisticated abacus it was discovered that Oasby had made the semifinals. Here they encountered Barrowby, who, thanks to espionage at the ICC, knew exactly how to defeat Oasby. Smack the bowling to all parts and then bowl them out. Oasby went down fighting and made haste to the pub, where they woke up the sleeping landlord, consumed excellent Abbott and went home to sleep. In that order.

Sunday August 23rd; The Nelsons Ashes at home; Oasby 132 - 7 off 40 overs, Nelsons Ashes 88 allout off 28.5 overs; Oasby won by 44 runs

No rain, and a day of great celebration. We won the Ashes and Oasby were triumphant.
Oasby batted first and made slow progress. Diligent, steady, grafting, batsmanship was displayed with great knowledge of when to use the pad. The boundary was too far away, runs were accumulated and significant scores made by Caley and Guinness despite the best efforts of "Ken". Monty was treated with much respect, his skyward-bound deliveries occasionally travelling the full 22 yards. Gilbert prospered until "Ken" returned - Gilbert electing not to play the straight one. By contrast Chandler J felt the big heave was the better shot - and he was right. Four! Was 132 enough - doubtful but many fine proteinaceous foods were on offer, mainly not consumed by Young who favoured a suspicious white powder. It was rumoured that Oasby would open with the bamboozling spin of Tedbury - happily Captain Caley pursued a more traditional route and opened with the white-powder fueled Young and the pork pie fueled Chandler J. Skipping like a gazelle and roaring his appeals like a lion Young was six times successful, the celebrations getting ever more elaborate. Chandler quietly, meanly, restrictive at the other end. When they rested, surely the spin meister and Gilbert would maintain the pressure? Well, Gilbert did. Tedbury has returned to his county to remodel his action. Least said.......So who would step up? Guinness - released from keeping duties, prowling the field like a hungry tiger - called forth to produce baffling spin. And he did. Getting his wicket in the traditional way - the straight one. Some enthusiastic fielding, some youthful wicketkeeping (the understanding between Rieder and Gilbert will become legendary, it just isn't yet) and overall a splendid effort by all.

Beer at The Houblon -10/10 (it tastes twice as good when its free)

Caley 22, Guinness 18, Hyland 10, Gilbert 39, Young 3, Earnshaw 9, Rieder 1, Chandler 7 n.o, Baker 3 n.o., Tedbury dnb, Clamp dnb
Chandler J 7.5-3-11-2, Young 8-1-31-6, Tedbury 2-0-24-0, Gilbert 8-3-14-1, Guinness 2-1-2-1


Saturday Aug 1st. Ashby folville away. Rain affected game.Ashby 120-4 off 36 overs.Oasby Wet.

A moist scene greeted the traveling gladiators of Oasby to Leicestershire. Covers were removed and Oasby elected to get wet in the field. Chandler and Gilbert produced an inspired opening spell of swing bowling,' making it talk ',before wetness took its toll and turned the cherry to a soapy slippy mess. Young took over the mantel, sprinting to the wicket like a nervous thorough bred. He even pitched it in the same half of the pitch as the batsman. Tedbury made the ball mumble rather than talk. Nil desperandum. Chandler would surely pouch a catch off Tedbury! The panic in Tedbury's eyes as he realised that the dolly catch was spooning towards Chandler was only matched by the terror in Chandlers eyes as he realised that this was his moment. 'Grace','athletic' and 'competent' are words seldom written in a sentence describing Chandler and unfortunately they can not be used to describe what ensued. To his credit, Chandler tried his best. To comic effect he 'dived' for the ball, missing it and hitting the ground with a sickening thud. After shocks are still being reported in nearby villages and many chimneys will need attention from the seismic activity associated with Chandlers fielding. A depression in the outfield will forever be known as 'Jon boys dip'. Extravagant fielding from Young, beautiful pick ups from Hall and Hyland. Heroic efforts from Clamp, defending his boundary like a man on roller skates. Rieder kept up spirits with his shouts of encouragement and acrobatic antics. Gilbert ,biting his tongue, complained not once of the worsening weather. Hall came on to Bowl in the moistness of a British summer in August. For the second week running, Hall made the the umpires call time on the proceedings due to his lightening pace and honed direction, fearing for the batsman's safety. Covers on, early tea and to the Pub. Game abandoned.
Everards original .Well conditioned.9/10. Houblon Inn. Free pints to those who patronised. And yes. The Author did buy a round.

Chandler 7-0-23-0, Gilbert 8-3-13-2,Young 4-1-17-0, Heaver 8-1-30-1,Tedbury 8-0-33-1, Hall 1-0-10-0.


Sunday 19th July 2009; Scopwick away; game drawn due to drowning. Oasby 178 all out after 34.2 overs, Scopwick 110 for 6 off 18 overs. Rain, no, really, RAIN!!!!!! (stopped play)

The writer of this report apologises for any inaccuracies. His notebook was washed away in the monsoon that started during the match, rendering accurate reporting impossible.

Oasby batted first and largely enjoyed themselves. Runs were there for the taking but Caley and Hyland did not want any; Guinness and Gilbert batted well in between showers to reach fifties and Hall struck the roof of the passing London bus two more times in a vigorous 33. At tea Oasby were happy and eager to bowl. Another victory was coming their way. As, indeed seemed inevitable as Gilbert ploughed his way through the opposition. Most wickets best described as "puddle before wicket". Chandler struggled up hill, Tedbury lay down on the pitch (again)and Hall worried the batsmen. Other bowlers and newcomers were eagerly waiting in the wings. Fielding by all was slidily enthusiastic with good contributions from the more youthful members. Did Captain Caley have a Muralitharan up his (long) sleeve? We will never know ,as eventually the wails of displeasure from Gilbert reached the umpires' ears. The batman's (I mean "Sarge's") plee of "it's not raining much" was rejected and the match declared a draw. The met office comfirmed that Monsoon Hannah had settled over RAF Digby - attracted there by the secret communications base. We look forward to our next match there, fully expecting rain at 3pm.

Beer at The Royal Oak was very satisfactory : Skipton Ale's Copper Dragon finding many admirers. 9/10

Caley 0, Guinness 57, Hyland 0, Gilbert 54, Dayal 3, Rieder 3, North 0, Hall 33, Chandler 0, Tedbury 2 n.o., Clamp 1
Gilbert 8-0-39-5, Chandler 6-0-31-0, Tedbury 3-0-29-1, Hall 1-0-10-0.

Wednesday 15th July 2009; Seas End Hall away, Oasby lost by 70 runs

Weather: sunny with a great big black cloud. No rain. Fine sunset.

Game: 20 overs per side, 3 overs per bowler, Oasby bowled first.

Oasby started with 9 players on the pitch which rapidly escalted to 12, SEH objected, Guiness acted innocent. It did not work. Later Thompson reduced the numbers by crashing into the sightscreen with his leg. Blood, pain and vomit ensued. Doctors and ex-doctors tended him; they were useless. He went to hospital for proper attention. We wish him well. Bowling was hard work and bowlers suffered though Young demonstrated that he had listened to his team-mates. Wickets and good economy resulted. Chandler was treated with respect and rewarded; Tedbury treated contemptuously but got revenge. Captain Caley found ways to induce the call "no-ball" but all felt some degree of happiness that they had contributed.

Fielding highlight: direct hit run out by Gilbert. Gary Pratt look out!

Batting highlight: Gilbert 25 not out and later recalled to complete his innings. Dourly he prodded for what seemed like hours in an obvious attempt at average increasing. Sadly few others enjoyed success. Chandler sent in early to swing. He did but missed the ball which hit the stumps. Hall saw that passing London bus (he dreams a lot) and nearly lost two more balls on its roof. At least he reached double figures. As did Young who begins to look as if he could reach the level he says he can achieve.

Comedy awards: Gilbert's running with every partner. "Yes, yes, YES, YES, YES" How do they survive? Tedbury's stumping - stranded and pointless - why is he so immobile? Why lie down on the pitch when he should be batting. We know not.

Beer at The Golden Lion: 9/10. Good quality Bombadier in good condition at the correct temperature and Guinness with a pretty heart for Guinness. 1 point deducted for no other choice of real ale.

Chandler 3-0-15-1, Tedbury 3-0-26-1, Young 3-0-10-2, Gilbert 3-0-15-0, Hall 3-0-30-0, Caley 3-0-26-0, Kennedy 1-0-7-0, Husemeyer 1-0-?-0

Caley 2, Guinness 3, Chandler 0, Hall 11, Gilbert 26 n.o., Hyland 7, Husemeyer 4, Young 12 n.o., Tedbury 0, Clamp 0, Thompson and Kennedy absent with medical leave.


Sunday 5th July 2009; Nelson's Ashes away , Oasby won by 54 runs

It was a fine day soon to be improved by the lifting of Oasby spirits. Oasby elected to bat and prospered. A rainbow saluted the result.

Nelson's Ashes finest bowlers strove to frighten Messrs Caley and Guinness. They did not succeed. Caley felt they needed catching practice (he was correct) and perished, sadly, soon to be followed by Husemeyer failing to hit the straight full toss. In came Gilbert. Frankly Gilbert should have also perished but that catching practice is sorely needed in Weston. There followed a flurry of fours and scampered singles as "Monty" received his punishment. All too soon Gilbert was recalled. He refused. A messenger had to be sent to explain that he had been too good and he had to let the other boys play; an invitation largely refused by Young, Hyland and Heaver. Guinness slowly amassed singles then realised how close the boundary was, and had to be recalled, he did not cry. Oasby brought in their cockney ringer. Successfully. He saw a London bus on the road and with a flourish the cricket ball landed directly on it. Regal entertainment.But not to be repeated. Luckily Chandler was in smiting mood, with Tedbury prodding many singles to allow the "big Kahuna" full swing. Oasby were happy with 196 and were not overly tempted by the splendid feast, wine and ales laid on for "tea". (They suspected a plot to cause sluggish fielding and exploding stomachs).

Bowling: a mixed performance but overall a good one. Chandler mean as ever but wicketless; Gilbert improved on the previous week; Tedbury confusing to all - especially their wicket keeper failing to spot the staight one and offering no shot; Young repeatedly implored by his captain and coach to pitch it up; it is not clear he knows what this means ; perhaps his education is of poor quality, however he did collect a wicket ; Heaver as generous as ever and Hall with a splendid display of wides; and a wicket each. If Oasby had a bowling coach he would encourage consistency of length and discourage the 4 and 6 balls to be found in too many bowlers' overs.

Fielding: good, though cries of encouragement were required towards the end to bolster spirits and some doctors paid fines. They can afford them. Guinness effected a splendid stumping. Mention must also be made of the fine running out of the opposition captain by Gilbert's deflection of a fierce drive onto the stumps. The bat throwing competition once again easily won by that individual.

Beer: Everards tasteless and soapy Sam Smith's do not appeal to all so 7/10 (they were not off and the pub is attractive) hence a swift departure to Oasby and the free pint.

Is this the pinnacle of the year or merely a point on the upward gradient? Time will tell.

NB - see photos.

Caley 10, Guinness 51 retired, Husemeyer 1, Gilbert 51 retired, Hyland 2, Young 5, Heaver 0, Hall 11,Tedbury 8 n.o., Chandler 21 n.o., Baker dnb (injured hand)
Chandler 4-1-8-0, Young 3-0-19-1, Tedbury 7-0-40-3, Gilbert 7-1-30-2, Heaver 3.1-0-24-1, Hall 3-0-16-1

Wednesday 1st July 2009

We have a report of an unusual noise to be heard on the road between Hougham and Marston. Some say it sounds like a Chandler on a sunday afternoon, others say it is the sound of a wicket-keeper chuntering; words like "catch" and " leg-side" are to be heard, floating in the wind, along with "umpire" ,"should have walked" and "not fair". No-one really understands but perhaps an Australian given out in the next few days with no chance of appeal would sympathise......

Sunday 28th June 2009; Hougham and Marston away; Oasby lost by 6 wickets

On this sunny summer Sunday with much heat and moisture Oasby collected twelve players but still lost. It was clear from the start, however that HAMS were scared of Oasby - they had scoured the Indian sub-continent to discover two fearsome Indian stars. Oasby had two slightly less fearsome 'boks. Therein, perhaps, lay the difference.
Oasby batted first with grim-faced determination. Few wickets fell for many an hour, regrettably few runs accumulated and eventually despite great striving the openers departed. Guinness happy to have progressed beyond single figures. Boundaries were hard to find though Tedbury used the edge of his bat to great effect. He also caused further disquiet by refusing to walk when apparently caught behind. "Not out" said umpire Husemeyer - words that Gilbert and Heaver felt should have been repeated later. Gilbert's patient effort brought to an end by the"lbw" decision. Do doctors like making enemies in their own team?

Bowling - welcome back Chandler! Three wickets in over number one. Unfortunately no other bowler could replicate this feat. Many edges, a dropped catch, some confident lbw appeals - no wickets until the generous Heaver came on - he once again bought a wicket but the match was lost. But we felt happier. We had demonstrated great effort. A win must be near.

Beer - Thorold Arms Marston - 9/10. Good quality Abbott but no other real ale choice. Good atmosphere from the opposition.

Guinness 18, Husemeyer 7, Kennedy 4, Hyland 10, Gilbert 27, Hall 8, Roberts 0, Young 1, Tedbury 16, Heaver 0, Chandler 0no, Dave 0.
Chandler 5.3-1-8-3, Young 8-1-24-0, Gilbert 7-0-36-0, Tedbury 6-0-20-0, Heaver 1-0-11-1, Roberts 5-0-17-0

Sunday June 21st 2009; Fenland Poachers away; Oasby lost by 61 runs

The reporter for this game has gone AWOL. Some say through excessive embarrassment. May Oasby-ites were missing, the holidays take their toll. Others were merely absent through fear of the web-footed fen-folk. Whatever, the fen-folk crushed Oasby. 'Nuff said.

Vinegar - should have been beer but was not - 3 pints had to be returned with the comment "where's the chips?" so 0/10

Chandler 8-0-21-1; Gilbert 8-2-21-2; Young 8-1-34-1; Wright 8-1-21-1; Heaver 8-0-47-2
Guinness 0, Husemeyer 7, Hyland 6, Duncan 9, Gilbert 10, Young 3, J Hadlow 1, L Hadlow 1(probably), Heaver 24n.o., Chandler 0, Wright 14


Saturday May 30th 2009; Ashby Carrington at home (Oasby's home); Oasby lost by 94 runs

On a glorious afternoon Oasby assembled early at Ancaster, unfortunately Ashby assembled at Ashby. They were wrong. Thus it was not until 3pm that the conflict started. Oasby used the extra hour to practice. This helped the fielding greatly. The same could not be said of the batting.

Ashby were invited to bat first and prospered. Chandler and Roberts were once again mean but unrewarded with wickets. They were replaced by Field and Gilbert who both almost immediately broke. Would Tedbury and Heaver take full advantage of a prolonged spell of bowling? No. Both would give away too many runs though Heaver was rewarded with wickets. Where is that spinning finger of Dr Spin?
This reporter has searched diligently for positives to "build upon" and finds that the fielding was tidy (Chandler may disagree but then he always does) and no catches were spilt. Roberts took the only offering with glee. Gilbert frequently failed to move blaming pain and claiming that the doctor's medicine did not work. Could this be?

After a tea largely provided by Mrs Guinness (why were players missing? - they were watching other sportsmen perform in distant cities) Oasby batted. The tone was set by the first ball dismissal of the puzzled Caley. Thereafter Young tried to instill urgency and Gilbert grunted his way past 20. Other displays were undistinguished. Even Heaver missed out on a long hop bowled at 20mph being adjudged lbw by the fiendish umpire Tedbury. More enemies for Tedbury. Perhaps mention should be made of another Chandler 4; or perhaps not. Oasby would like to see more of them.

We repaired to the pub and drank beer. We did not shelter in the "Smokers' Den" but consumed Old Boy and 6x. They were adequate (8/10) but not sufficient to repair the sense of loss. We shall practice on uneven astroturf and concrete. This may help. To the next game.

Chandler 6-0-11-0; Roberts 6-0-21-0; Gilbert 3-0-9-0; Heaver 6-0-39-3; Tedbury 6-0-34-0; Hall 1-0-1-0; Rieder 2-0-13-0
Caley 0, Tedbury 5, Young 19, Gilbert 22, Thomson 4; Rieder 0; Heaver 3; Chandler 5; Hall 5 no; Roberts not available

Sunday May 24th 2009; Ancaster home, Oasby lost by 47 runs.

Put into bat, Ancaster made steady progress to a modest 147. Scoring was kept to a crawl by the opening pair of Chandler and Roberts who toiled on a slow surface. Gilbert kept his end tight, whilst the exuberant Caley tweaked a wicket from the other. Tedbury kept his spinning delivery in the locker for another day, using his full toss as a variation to the long hop. Fines had to be paid by Husemeyer and Chandler for butter fingering, whilst Tedbury and Guinness combined with great effect to make a non neutral umpire even more non neutral. Rieder also got in the wickets.
To Batting.
During the tea interval the pitch deteriorated badly. Oasby are so often unlucky in this regard. Wickets fell at an alarming rate. Apart from a cameo thrash by Clamp the top order were rolled over. Only Gilbert and Roberts, with a partnership of 47, stopped the rot. Roberts manfully fended the ball off with his 'old man' , his pads, his elbow and his wrist. At drinks he was told to use his bat, and his game improved. Tedbury and Gilly took the score past the magic ton to much applause. With time running out the scoring needed to accelerate. Trying to force the pace Gilbert played on and then Tedbury put his weight (six stone wet through) into a massive drive that failed to beat the bowler 21 yards away. 102 all out showed improvement.
A quick half at Ancaster and back to the Houblon for whistles to be wetted.

Roberts 7-0-22-0. Chandler 8-1-21-0. Gilbert 10-3-19-1. L.Caley 5-0-31-1. Tedbury 7-0-44-1. A.Rieder 3-1-6-1.
Guinness 4. Hyland 3. Clamp 5. Husemeyer 0. Rieder 2. Gilbert 37. Caley 4. Thompson 4. Roberts 21. Tedbury 6.


Sunday May 5th 2009; Pinchbeck away, Oasby lost by 7 wickets

Oasby travelled across many a flat plain to arrive at Pinchbeck - a well signposted pitch with many positive features. Sadly very few of the positives were in Oasby's favour. The captain arrived to cries of "Who's that man?" and "Ben, your bag smells awful", proceeded to the middle with the opposing captain and lost the toss. Oasby were directed to bat first.

So we did.

Badly.

The pitch looked good but was, in fact uneven. The light was flat, like the countryside. The air was chill with winds from North-west by west yet little could excuse the frankly lame performance of the Oasby faithful new and old. They have found new batsmen to emulate the old batsmen. The first over was great, boundaries were scored with bat and without. Caley was imperious. Downhill thereafter. Guiness craved the pub so departed early; Hyland showed aggression and was rewarded, briefly, Husemeyer showed style and was rewarded with hamstrings (ed. - I don't understand this - I think it's a kind of pain), Thompson, Clamp and Hall felt the scorer needed a rest while Tedbury tried to bore everyone to death. It did not work. Chandler and Heaver showed that boundaries were possible but all too soon the party was over. A meagre 65 runs had been amassed and twelve had been off the first over!

Bowling was a better story, Oasby only had time to try four bowlers but all acquitted themselves well, they felt. Newcomer Hall was mean and rewarded with wickets, Chandler was mean and rewarded with a wicket. Tedbury was mean but unrewarded and Roberts, though unrewarded showed promise. Two catches were spilt, though debutant Husemeyer showed panther-like ability in the slips to help Hall to his two-wicket haul.

The pub beckoned. This year we are going to award points for the ale provided at post-game pubs. "The Bull" at Pinchbeck scored 10/10 for being open, 6/10 for speed of service and 6/10 for quality of beer. Guiness decide his Guiness was imperfect as its head was substandard while Tedbury and Caley decide their "Real Ale" was "OK", ie not interesting enough and frankly a bit stale tasting. Opinion - the pipes needed cleaning.

And so to nets on Thursday whereat everything will be made right and we shall plot future triumphs. Adios!

Caley 6, Guiness 0, Hyland 14, Thompson 0, Roberts 4, Hall 0, Husemeyer 9, Tedbury 2, Chandler 4, Clamp 0, Heaver 6 n.o.
Chandler 7-1-17-1; Roberts 4-0-19-0; Hall 4-1-29-2; Tedbury 6.1-2-14-0